Olivier Lacan { thoughts }

T-Che

Viva La EvolucionTo the estate of Ernesto “Che” Guevara,

I rep­re­sent the Asso­ci­a­tion of Dic­ta­tors, War­lords and Other Mass Mur­der­ers of Amer­ica (hereto­fore ref­ferred to as “ADWOMMA”) and would like to license the like­ness for Ernesto “Che” Gue­vara (hereby referred to as “Mur­derer”) for exclu­sive use on a series of highly orig­i­nal fash­ion items such as t-shirts, base­ball hats, head­bands and hoodies.

While we do not expect these items to remain on the mar­ket for longer than a sea­son con­sid­er­ing the inher­ent con­tra­dic­tion between Murderer’s philo­soph­i­cal con­vic­tions and those of our prospec­tive clients we reserve the right to extend our usage and repro­duc­tion rights in per­pe­tu­ity based on the mar­ket reac­tion to our product.

Murderer’s like­ness will be plas­tered on as many of ADWOMMA’s prod­ucts as pos­si­ble. We wish to use the “rebel­lious” and “anti-establishment” notions asso­ci­ated with Murderer’s face and name (which, in fact, may be used on the prod­ucts) while hop­ing our cus­tomers will remain bliss­fully igno­rant of all the pain and suf­fer­ing Mur­derer has caused (to his credit) on gen­er­a­tions of compatriots.

Although Mur­derer may have objected to our pro­ceed­ings dur­ing his life­time since we recall he didn’t acknowl­edge the exis­tence of “pri­vate prop­erty”, the usage we will make of his like­ness will be of a com­mer­cial nature. We intend to pro­duce items includ­ing but not lim­ited to the ones described and pro­ceed to resell licenses to these prod­ucts to other man­u­fac­tur­ers around the world in the (unlikely) event that they become profitable.

As com­pen­sa­tion, we offer to pre­tend the val­ues of Mur­derer still have any rel­e­vance in our mod­ern (i.e. non-barbaric) soci­ety. We con­sid­ered offer­ing monies but ulti­mately decided against it with the under­stand­ing that such a propo­si­tion would be an insult to Murderer’s mem­ory and legacy.

Very sin­cerely,
Olivier Lacan
sales@adwomma.org

PS: writ­ten for an intel­lec­tual prop­erty and law class I was tak­ing yesterday.

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